Help

[~justme~]

Not sure where to post this.... My daughter and I both suffer with bipolar. She is 13. She takes meds. Currently abilify 5mg and Zoloft 50mg Xanax .25 as needed... I am struggling recently with her understanding the importance of taking her meds. She is starting to fight me over having to take her meds and saying its her body. Her moods are changing a little more as of yesterday morning she has been in the up and down. Moods swings at there worse today. She is getting ready for exams this week and being very negative. Even with her disorders, she started this school year in the 7th grade and after 9 weeks they moved her to the 8th grade because she was doing so well. I am not sure what to do and with my mood swings I'm not sure how to explain things to her. I know the importance of the meds but don't know how to get her to understand. She has been through so much in her life. We were reunited in may of this year after her father kept her from me for 6 years. She was told alot of hateful things like I don't want her and bever did and for 6 years I was on a search for her and to get her back and since then her father has lost rights to her. While with her father she was molested by 2 different people and was self harming. All of which her father knew nothing about ( lack of paying attention to her) and within her first month with me I found all of this out from her. She was neglected and discouraged for the years she was away from me. I need help!! Please any suggestions....

[br350]

justme, I am so sorry to hear about what your daughter has been through....and you as well, as a mom trying to find her then trying to help her with all that has gone on the past six years.  I don't know what your medical insurance is like but the very first thing I would do is try to get in therapy with her.  Have no idea if she will even be open to that but after the molestation and self harming she needs therapy and it would probably benefit the both of you tremendously if you were in some therapy together (and separately).  Actually, after writing this I realize that you are probably seeing someone or how would she have prescriptions for meds?  But is it just medication therapy or is there counseling?  I would think the healing from all of this will take some time and a great deal of mutual communication and love.  I obviously don't know all the details of what's going on but certainly it is clear that you love her and want to help her heal and get better.  I wish you the very best in all of this.

[~justme~]

Phychiatrists and Councelor she is seeing. So she has meds and therapy. I am the same. It's just really hard dealing and coping with everything. Thanks for your response.  I appreciate it.

[br350]

This is also a tough age because so many changes are happening in their bodies.  My son is in 7th grade and I have a niece and nephew in 6th and 8th grade. So much change and their hormones and everything makes for a very interesting mix.  I know that my niece seemed to get more moody when she turned 13 and my sister has definitely attributed it to hormonal fluctuations and her just starting her period.  I'm sorry this is such a tough time. Unfortunately your daughter may have to learn a little bit the hard way about how important the medication is.  I have asthma an when I was youjng I was terrible about taking my inhalers even though I knew I needed them.  It kind of goes with the territory of youth, a bit, I guess.  All you can do is be super supportive and in communication with her therapist and be there as best you can for her.  I know this is hard because you have your own stuff you are dealing with.   I hope that you have some family or friends that are open to talking with you because that is often indispensible as well.   Try to hang in there!