Am I having some kind of breakdown?

[scvjunkie]

Hello again, everyone. Hopefully this is in the right place... I wasn't sure whether to put this here or in GAD or somewhere else... I apologize if I did this wrong.

I was at my parents' house today, just visiting. I have a lot of health anxiety, so little things like gas or indigestion will set me off. So when I had some cramping in my abdomen, I freaked out and set off all kinds of other symptoms that I know are anxiety-related, but now it's escalated.

I was watching a movie with dad about a guy who got into a car accident with a big milk truck and went into a coma for five years (The Dead Zone). When he came out of the coma, his whole life was upside-down. Anyway, my mom was about to leave to go to church and as she was leaving, she said something that I'm sure she meant as a joke: "Maybe I could just go into a coma for like three years, then I could wake up and all my bills would be paid off and I would get my social security." Well, she said that while I was having my hypochondriatic freak-out.

I just left dad's house and I panicked the whole time... felt on the verge of tears the whole way home... I said "this is irrational; nothing's going to happen." Then I just got this really stupid and random thought in my head... I feel embarrassed to even be saying it... I was like, "If you see a big truck, then go drive to mom's church and wait for it to get out, then follow her home and everything will be okay." At this point, I should mention that the intersection to my house is in front of a gas station where big trucks ALWAYS stop. I have noted this before. Well, I saw two trucks this evening and I panicked, but I told myself that I would be letting the anxiety win if I drove all the way out to mom's church and followed her home to make sure everything was alright. So I didn't.

But now I'm really, really panicky and I don't know what to do. =/

[writtenINpanic]

I can relate, I have extreme paranoia. Just keep trying to tell yourself that nothing bad is going to happen and demand your mind to stop making you believe those things. Easier said than done I know. Keep your head up