Possible depression (rant)

[realityiscliche]

I'm not sure if I should put this in here, since I'm not technically diagnosed and it might just be temporary feelings of sadness but I honestly think that I am depressed.

I've always been an anxious person (I do have health anxiety)
but I've never been a "depressed" person.

Today it just all really slammed me in the face. My parents got divorced last fall. My family dog died not long after that. I moved home from college. My boyfriend of 2 years left me for a friend that I had in college, and basically told me that he wasn't able to ever fall in love with me. I guess a lot of unfortunate things happened at once, but I always had the mindset "Hey, there are people going through way worse things than you. Suck it up." I'm just like my dad. I don't necessarily tuck my feelings away but I just drop things and pretend like I'm a brick wall that nobody can possibly get through.
Now lets fast forward a little bit. I've had a bunch of added stress lately because I bought my first car (car payments, insurance payments, gas) and because of that I've picked up an additional job and am basically working 6 or 7 days a week. My friends are literally my only get away. I feel like I became really dependent on them to grip onto my sanity and well being. Today was a slap in the face though. I officially realized that all of my friends have boyfriends/girlfriends.

I feel so alone. Literally, so alone.
My life is just a repeat of wake up, eat, work, eat, sleep. Do it again. With hardly any social interaction anymore.
I know that that's "life" and that's a part of growing up but really? Since when did people's happiness DEPEND on their "significant" others?
All of my friends are under 21 for the most part. Basically I'm just trying to say. I'm lonely. I hate being single. I'm scared that I'm becoming depressed..

This girl is falling apart mentally.

[fortheloveofcats]

Part of the issues with anxiety and depression for me at least, can come present itself in the form of dependency issues. I have ruined several relationship and friendships because I was so dependent on my friends to pull me through each time I got worse.
I hate being single every once in awhile I think I'm going to lose it, but then I remember I need to have my life sorted out before I can include anyone else in it which is hard to accept. But I know where your coming from

[LindaRK]

Even though you haven't been diagnosed, have you considered seeing a doctor?  I think it's great that you are ahead of the game here.  Sure, this could feelings of sadness, but yes, it could also be depression.

You've been through alot.  I can relate somewhat to what you're feeling with my own issues as well.  Also, my youngest son graduated from college 2 years ago and has been unable to get a job, yet his older brother has no college degree and is gainfully employed.  There are other issues, too, like the break-up with his long-time girlfriend, but the rejection has caused alot of depression for him.  And he's having anxiety issues, too.

Part of what you're going through, is indeed, "life".  Get up, work or go to school, eat, go to sleep.  Throw some entertainment in there somewhere.  And it can get worse as you get older.  But, it's also a choice.  You say you have friends, but you feel lonely.  I don't understand that.  Do you feel like a burden to them?  Just because they have boyfriends or girlfriends shouldn't stop you from maintaining friendships with them.  Don't you think there will be a time when you will find someone to share your life with?  Try not to be too hard on yourself.  I think people put too much pressure on young people today.