crying scared and feeling out of control

[maninpgh]

This is my first time here.

I'm 37 I've been in therapy for anxiety for years. I take 40 mg of Paxil a day. The last time I had a major panic attack was a year and a half ago when I tried to stop taking my Paxil.

Yesterday I lost it.

Thursday my daughter had surgery..it went very well..she back to normal already.Friday I woke up sick with a fever throwing up. My wife had me stay up in the attic office all day so as to not get my daughter sick. I slept quite a bit then woke up in a panic. I felt so alone.I started to cry out of control.I was scared.I had add I was crying I kept on saying to my self..what wrong with me?

It was terrifying. It felt just like a panic attack but with the added crying.

Ifinally got my therapist on the phone today.she said it is normal for someone like me to feel like this being locked in the attic all day.

Today no longer sick but still was crying here and there.I just can't shake the horrible feeling I had yesterday.

Friends stopped over tonight and I felt much better having then over.

I just want to share this and find people I can talk to who understand.

Thanks.

[Itzomi]

Hi there!

With your daughter having surgery and already having an anxiety problem, that's an awful lot to handle.  Being cooped up in an attic when you don't feel well is even worse.  I'm so glad you had friends that came over to spend time with you - you really need support right now, other than your family. 

You are just on Emotion Overload.  Crying is atually a GOOD thing to do, to release those feelings.  It's very cleansing.  So, don't worry that you're crying - be thankful that you CAN cry.  Some people just can't, no matter how much they want to.  Cry as much as you can for as long as you want, and don't worry one little bit that something must be wrong with it.  Realizing that it's healthy and cleansing to cry will help you heal all the faster.  I wish you well!

[jane134]

Hi Maninpgh

I totally agree with Itzomi! Don't be too hard on yourself and accept this as nothing more than a minor set back. Its great that you have gone so long without any panic attacks. There is nothing wrong with a good old cry, like Itzomi said, its good to release those feelings. Far more healthier than bottling them inside and letting things get further on top of you.

Welcome to AZ. Glad you found us here 

[maninpgh]

I thought i was better, but i guess not. Today, i am watching my children while my wife goes out for a bit with her friends. So far i have cried out of control twice. I keep it away from the kids, say i have to go upstairs or something. but this time i'm not putting myself down for the crying.. just letting it out.

I still really feel like something is wrong. I'm starting to get the feeling of mild panic attacks, then that lead into crying. For moment i thought to myself "I don't know what else to do with my kids... what's wrong.." and paniced and that lead to crying. I'm panicing now. having trouble breathing.

I did 15 min on the treadmill..

This all just doesn't make sense to me. I'm on my paxil. I've never had panic attacks on the paxil.

My mom said maybe they could put me on abilify for a month.. that it helped her friend.. anyone else have experience with that?

[Itzomi]

If I were your doctor - and most regular doctors don't even bother with this, unfortunately - I'd want to get to the root cause of your panic/depression.  Such as, are you deficient in any nutrients?  Is anything physically "off" (like thyroid) that could be easily tweaked? 

It wouldn't hurt to try a new med, but I'd rather see you get to the bottom of why you're feeling like this in the first place?

[maninpgh]

Update...today I feel so muchbetter. Back to normal even. I really believe I had a lot of repressed feelings about my daughters surgery. Normally they would come out and I'd feel better. However bring sick and locked up in the attic just contributed to the perfect storm of my emotions. I was able to take to my therapist and she told me to keep reminding myself that this is temporarily and it will pass. I also took events advice and just let myself cry witho ut feeling bad about it.

Today being Monday and going back to work just brought it all back to normal for me. I'm so grateful forall the support.

I'm going to start a healthier eating habit..and start r excising as well. I will remember to live each day as positive as I can.