How Do You Get Over a Traumatic Experience ?!

[Kayl.xo]

Hey,

I'm new to this site, but I've had this question for such a long time now, do people ever overcome horrifying pasts?

A little background history on myself, I have been sexually assaulted, abused physically, sexually and emotionally for 4 years from my ex fiance and I always suppressed my feelings and that lead to depression and PTSD. I get horrible panic attacks and very vivid nightmares and I just always felt as if it would never get easier.

I have tried many other ways of overcoming my past by improving myself such as getting a diploma, getting a good job and so on and so forth, but i mean, at the end of the day I'm still feeling lonely and just plain devastated.

So, can someone please tell me what I can do to feel better!! Will this ever end ? 

Thank you so much for looking this over. xo much love 
Kayl.

[Cuchculan]

Welcome to the forum. Look up EMT theraphy. It is a form of theraphy they use on PSTD patients. Never had it done myself. But it is meant to be good. It might be the answer you need. It is just a case of trying to find that one thing that works for you. There are so many forms of theraphy out there. We can try and get on with life as normal. But the beast still lurks deep within. Comes out when we least expect it. It is clear the past has to be addressed and faced up to. If you want to move forward. It won't be easy. May have to get harder before it begins to get better. But never say never.

[flutist4life]

I went through this same thing 7 years ago but it was with my step dad at the time. It still haunts me to this day and how I dealt with it was making myself busy and surrounding myself with people who are a positive influence. I have nightmares of being attacked and wake up in sleep paralysis and watch myself being attacked but can't do anything about it. This kind of trauma may never go away but you can do things to things to make sure it doesn't take over your life. I decided to take kickboxing, self defense and carry pepper spray everywhere with me, if you carry it around make sure it's one that has to face the right way to be sprayed so you don't spray yourself. Once I started kickboxing and took a self defense class it made me feel more secure and confident, just not too confident. The things they teach in self defense are to give you that 1 to 2 seconds to run. The moves are also made so it doesn't matter how much bigger your opponent is than you it will still work.

[Cuchculan]

I went through this same thing 7 years ago but it was with my step dad at the time. It still haunts me to this day and how I dealt with it was making myself busy and surrounding myself with people who are a positive influence. I have nightmares of being attacked and wake up in sleep paralysis and watch myself being attacked but can't do anything about it. This kind of trauma may never go away but you can do things to things to make sure it doesn't take over your life. I decided to take kickboxing, self defense and carry pepper spray everywhere with me, if you carry it around make sure it's one that has to face the right way to be sprayed so you don't spray yourself. Once I started kickboxing and took a self defense class it made me feel more secure and confident, just not too confident. The things they teach in self defense are to give you that 1 to 2 seconds to run. The moves are also made so it doesn't matter how much bigger your opponent is than you it will still work.

It all sounds great learning how to defend yourself. It would give you some form of focus. But have you ever dealt with the underlying problems? We all have issues on the site. If we just ignore the issues they will always remain with us. You say it still haunts you to this day. So whereby you have taken up a self defence class you have never really dealt with the issues that put you were you are at right now. And they will continue to haunt you until they are tackled. Distraction works by blocking out that which we fear. But the fear will always remain. It doesn't just vanish. Hence treatmet is something I would strongly suggest. Along with the self defence classes too. Both can go hand in hand. I am not saying stop one and start the other. Far from it. But don't ignore the past thinking it will just vanish. It won't. You may be able to bury away for years. But this is what forms the basis for PTSD. Buried problems coming back to haunt us.

[flutist4life]

This kind of thing is not something that goes away that fear no matter what happens will always be there. I tried therapy and all that and it didn't help. My point by saying learning to defend yourself was because it made me less afraid that is just what worked for me. Although it didn't take away those feelings completely it decreased them. Everyone I know who has been through it is still fearful of it happening again. So by learning to defend yourself it makes it easier to feel as if you know you can put up a better fight if it does happen again and to me it also meant I did something about that fear instead of doing nothing at all. I also wrote down a letter that was never sent but it said what I would say to the person who did this to me. I'm not afraid of him anymore because the experence made me stronger and I'm more successful than him but at times I do still feel the pain, nothing can ever completely take that away, we simply over come it by doing everything we can to make sure it doesn't happen again. That is what has given me strength at all.

[tigerpaw]

I know you will find lots of support here. Let me remind you you can access the Chat Room, after a minimum amount of posts and talk live to some of us here!  A great resource for you.

Also you can post your favorite picture in the Members Gallery.

Check out an introductory post on, "When you think no one understands ....read this."........Link: http://www.anxietyzone.com/index.php/topic,9100.0.html

Lots to do here~