I'm here because I am told there's nothing wrong with my heart. I mean, sort of. I have an enlarged left atrium and pvcs/palps. But I've had a ton of tests and my heart is healthy and fine and I'm told I'm at low risk of heart attack. I don't even really have high blood pressure, usually 120/80, though it's lower now because I'm on metoprolol (12.5mg in the morning and the same at night) to help with the palps. And it does. They're not nearly as strong and don't come as often.
I'm not totally healthy. I have PCOS which causes a lot of other annoying/painful symptoms.
But basically what happened was one day I was having a great day. I got up, I walked to go to bed and all of a sudden my heart started racing. I put one of those heart things on my finger to see my pulse that my boyfriend had bought for fun, and it went up over 160. It wouldn't stop. I thought I was having a heart attack. I couldn't speak clearly, my speech was slurring. My heart wouldn't slow down. It took like two hours for it to come down, in the hospital.
But they said nothing was wrong with my heart.
So I tried to go on with life, though paranoid about it. Then a week ago today I got up, my dog was sick. I cleaned up the mess she had made and laid back down to go back to sleep - I wanted to sleep in - and I felt the life go out of my arms. It felt like my heart had stopped. I reached up to feel my pulse and I felt nothing. I felt like I was dying. I sat up and all of a sudden bambambam.. heart came back in full force. Called the ambulance. They checked me, said my vitals were good though I looked anxious. Well, of course I did. I thought I was dying!
I didn't go with them to the ER but I did eventually go after some time because I wasn't feeling any better. The ER checked me out, did all kinds of tests (and on top of this I've had an ecg and a stress test that came back that my heart was structurally sound (except for the enlarged atrium) and good to go) and of course... everything was 'fine'. The doctor told me if I'd had a heart attack I would have passed out pretty quickly. But I did feel faint and like I was going to right before my heart started slamming in my chest again. It basically got after that to where I was trembling all day, nervous, couldn't sit still, pacing at work, trembling while trying to fall asleep and only able to sleep when absolutely exhausted - and constantly jerking awake in fear.
So I followed up with my PCP and she seemed almost angry at me. She didn't understand why I had gone to the ER. She said some things to my s/o that I disagree with.. for example, turning out the nightlight on me when I need it on to sleep. Somehow if this is severe anxiety I don't think "tough love" is the answer. Didn't work for me as a teenager for other things, and at almost thirty I don't see it working for me now for this.
She prescribed me an mood stabilizer called Lamotrigine. I haven't taken it because quite frankly if this is anxiety I want a chance to get over it on my own before I resort to medication. And I've been working on it. My anxiety levels have come down a lot but I can't shake this feeling of 'what if' about my heart. What if it did skip enough to miss two seconds or so of beats? What if I trust this is anxiety and then not be prepared for when it happens again?
Anyway.. so hi guys. Here I am. You seem like a great group and I'm glad this is here.