New to the Group - Need Direction!

[alanmike]

Hi All,
I'm brand new to this group and really hope you guys can give me some advice, direction, and help.  If I could characterize myself in a few words, they would be as follows: self-doubting, perfectionist, lack of self-confidence.  These traits do not bode well when I'm presented with a new challenge or opportunity.  When that new opportunity or challenge arises, I begin to think that I'm not the best person for the job or that someone else is a better fit or has the brains to do it better than me.  I'm also afraid that there's a good chance that because I'm not the best person for the opportunity, there's a good chance I will fail and will wish that I had never left my comfort zone.  So, sometimes I just pass on the opportunities.  Other times, when I decide to go ahead and confront the challenge or opportunity, the following cycle occurs:  I IMMEDIATELY feel overwhelmed and believe that I will never be able to conquer or learn the new opportunity or problem before me.  I start to self-doubt and conclude that I'm just not good enough, and then the physical characteristics of anxiety set in...tight chest, brain fog, inability to think or process, lack of interest in anything and everything else in life.  At that point I either quit or try to work through it and hope that I will somehow be adequate enough to do a decent job at it.  But again, the physical characteristics of anxiety make things much harder because the cycle has developed and it's almost impossible for me to break!  And the sad part of all this is that everyone around me thinks I'm wonderful at everything and have the ability to do anything I put my mind to.  I was a 4.0 student in college and did fairly well with the things I somehow found a way stick with.  I'm just tired of being held back by my fear of failure and fear of the inability to deal with my anxiety symptoms. 

Please feel free to ask me any other questions that you think might help you further evaluate my situation.  I'm open to any suggestions as to a starting point and plan to battle this problem.

[Perfectly_Imperfect]

Are you in therapy? If not, I'd say find a good therapist to do some CBT with you. If you think these negative thoughts you are never going to have a positive outcome. You need to change your thinking habits into positive ones. You need to take on a project and complete it so you can feel good and KNOW you can do it, instead of letting your fear inhabit you from finishing it. Getting out of your comfort zone is a big step especially for those people with GAD or even just minor anxiety. We need to learn that it's ok to do something different, and to be happy and positive about change.

Smile, think positive and start small ...