Phone anxiety?

[WorriedGirl91]

I really don't see why I even have a phone anymore. I can't answer any calls because I'm afraid it's going to be someone with terrible news. I also can't call professionals or businesses because I fear they will have an attitude with me. I have to call workforce services today so I can see if I qualify for Food Stamps...I've been sitting here writing down what I'm going to say and how I'm going to start off the conversation. I have to work myself up to call anybody (even my own boyfriend who would never reject me).

Sometimes when I call a business or even order Chinese food, I completely freeze up then hang up.
Does anyone have this or have a few tips on how to tell yourself to bite the bullet?

[Zaelaura]

the phone has been a problem for me since i was a kid.

used to be so bad i couldn't handle ordering pizza or calling to get hours of operation for the local pool (you have no idea how ecstatic i was when dominos & pizza hut started letting you order online and the pool started posting schedules on their website....)

right now, i only use the phone for outgoing calls or if someone in my immediate household calls me, my daughter's school calls me, or if i'm playing phone tag with the doctor or something. my voicemail message states very clearly that i do not answer incoming phone calls unless i am expecting the call, but that i will return voicemails as needed. i make it very clear that it's MY phone, and I will decide whom i want to talk to and when.

its not just nervousness about what the nature of the call could be or whether i'm going to say something wrong... my anxiety goes deep enough that i've grown to just hate talking on the phone period, for any reason. i have the attitude that, if i want to talk to someone, i will contact them. i feel almost like a person calling me and expecting me to answer is an invasion of my space and disrespectful - and i think that attitude is what also makes it difficult for me to call others... because, on some level, i feel like it's an annoyance and rude. i know that it's irrational and not how other people feel... but it's still the attitude i have toward the phone.

i guess the best advice i can offer is that if it's something you NEED to do, like calling to get an application for food stamps, just tell yourself that this isn't a burden for anyone, the people on the other end of the phone talk to way more crazy people every day than you could ever imagine, and that you just HAVE to get it over with... remind yourself that it's like a gross smelly bandaid that you HAVE to pull off, and that no matter how much it hurts yanking that sucker off, you'll be a lot happier and feel better once it's done.

[Grandma]

Hi WorriedGirl91 -

I have a son in law who has a doctorate in philosophy.  He is the most knowledgable, intelligent, and emotionally stable person I know.  After talking on the phone for any length of time, he needs to lie down to rest!

(I also have a son in law who is an abusive jerk, and he can talk on the phone all day long.)

Love, Grandma

[Princessa1]

Hi, what you can do when you call public agencies is, make sure you get the persons name upfront.  In case they are rude and you want to report.  Just say hi "To who am I speaking".  They probably dont want to be reported so maybe they'll be nicer if you know their name.  The fact that you write what you're gonna say is good.  Speak slowly and clearly.