sex addiction

[newo_ikken]

It has recently come to my attention that I may have a sex addiction. I don't know what to do about it. I am too embarrassed to speak to my therapist or anyone else i know about it. I feel like this compulsion I have is starting to get a bit out of hand. Has anyone experienced this?? Does anyone have any suggestions??

[Cuchculan]

If there is one thing that I have learned from the many anxiety sites that I have been around it is that people, not all, but loads, seem to have a high sex drive. Masturbation is wrote about a lot. None of that ever really surprised me. Because the first question a head doctor always seems to ask when you visit for the first time is ' do you masturbate a lot '? Over the years I have take to believing that the two must go hand in hand. ( No pun intended ) I think a lot of people see it as there form of distraction. I know you didn't mention masturbation in your post. But if you have this sex addiction I would assume, using common sense, that you must need relief some way. I have read of people who masturbate up to 20 times a day. It is just their way of getting by. And getting off.  We would need a bit more information about your own urges. It is hard to say if they are thoughts you are having. That may involve other people. And you are worried that you may follow through on these thoughts. If that is the case I would urge you to talk about it with your therapist. Most times such things are just thoughts. Nothing more, nothing less. But they still have to be dealt with. Even ask your therapist can write this stuff down, because you are not comfortable talking about it. I am sure the therapist would agree. If you can let us know a bit more it would help us to understand the problem a lot better. But help is always there. Just a case of getting the nerve up to seek out that help. If you think yourself that you may become a danger to others then that is when you have to bite the bullet and do all you can to stop it early.

[andreap]

I am not an anxiety sufferer, it is my husband who suffers.  But newo-ikken, you are definitely not alone.  I would say my husband has a sex addiction too.  He uses sex, porn, and drink as his "escapes".  It has taken me 5 years, and him leaving, for me to properly come to understanding it all, and not take it personally.  His focus on sex is most definitely an escape for him from the anxiety he is feeling much of the time. 
He saw a therapist for a while last year and she helped in a big way for him to see that he should not pile so much guilt on his own shoulders for it - that he really is not a bad person, but a decent person with an addiction.  It was all lowering his esteem in a big way because he felt "seedy" for what he was doing.  But he has come to see that it is an addiction, and it is there because of anxiety.  He needed to learn to control it, and within our relationship we both needed to find ways of managing it that we could both be comfortable with.  I think he is lucky that he has had me to "feed" his sex addiction!!!! 

If you are single, and your addiction is not hurting anyone else then it doesn't have to be such a big deal I think, but if you feel, like my husband did, that it is really controlling you and interfering with your everyday life, then you could talk to your therapist.  I don't think you should be embarrassed - I am sure most therapists have heard about similar experiences from other people.

[briteyes1002]

I do not have this addiction- but dated a guy who had it. PLease do not be ashamed and your should feel that no one will judge you hear. We all have our problems and issues and I am sure you will find members on here that can relate to you!

K

[JavaJoy01]

I wish I had your problem.  My anxiety had killed whatever sex drive I had.  When we try it hurts physically and the doctors can't find anything wrong.  My husband has a VERY healthy appetite and me I avoid it every chance I get.  I'm anxious about it hurting my marriage..

Anxiety can both kill your sex drive or raise it- think it depends on the person and they type of anxiety.  I wish the doctors could give me something to give me a sex drive