phobia of babysitting/harm or death to child under my supervision

[john5458]

    i volunteered to help my sister with domestic duties when her house person had to quit. i specified i'd do anything except major babysitting. so she got me to keep her 6 and 8 y.o.'s after school for 3.5 hours a weekday.    at first pdoc and i raised my ssri, that helped some, then a few months later i had to quit volunteering.

   any time i would get in a babysitting situation, i would have visuals of blood, broken skulls, etc, i guess in the "shorthand" form that OCD takes. mostly my response would be to be avoidant on the job, thereby rendering my help much less effective.

   im to see a therapist in mid-jan 2011, so i remain optimistic.

   a past counselor told me OCD is a biochemical brain flash that manifests as a taboo thought. it is only now that i have unraveled the mechanics of my personal thinking process in this area - so although it hampers my functioning, i can see it better.

   any comments, input, feedback appreciated   

   

[s3ptember]

I can only give you positive motivation and say to face your "fear" of babysitting head on and to continue it. I know how hard that is to do, trust me. One step at a time. One day at a time.

[seekinghelp34]

Hello John5458,

I suggest going through counseling before babysitting any further. Childcare is a lot of responsibility.

OCD is tricky but it can be helped with treatment. I had some of the same fears after my 2nd child was born. Therapy helped immensely! 

[rockerchick89]

scary stuff