anxiety disorder, depression, cfs and now parents splitting up

[twinkletoes]

im not sure how much more i can handle! i felt like my life was falling to bits just through illness, i go to cbt once a fortnight.. which hasnt helped me in the slightest so far, im waiting on a date for an operation as my bladder decided one day over a year ago it didnt want to work, i thought everything that could go wrong has.. then i get hit with the news that my mum and stepdad (hes basicly my dad) are splitting up. i totally agree with the split as mum has been happy for a while and if theres one thing i really hate its see'ing my mum unhappy.
i didnt find out in a nice way, i just walked in as an arguement was ending and mum was on the phone getting her name on the councils housing list.
good bye to the one hobby ive managed to keep up and the one thing thats distracted me from depression.. my horses! its going to be a tough chaange of lifestyle but i would try anything to see my mum happy again.
its still a bit of an open wound for mum so its been tough talking to her inbetween lots of tears from both of us.. she has an infectous cry! ive assured her that ill stick by her no matter what and shes to do whatever she feels is right

i just feel so alone and helpless. its been really akward around the house, anxiety is taking over and im starting to do the "mind reading" thing that i know im not good at. ive been a couple of months now without resorting to self harmbut this has just been to hard to deal with. i actually can only vaguely remember doing it

i dont even know what else to say.. i suppose i just really need a good moan, my head is such a mess