Death phobia taking back seat to AIDS Phobia!

[nicki4nyc]

I've been married for 7 years and my husband has cheated on me in the past.  I've had two AIDS/HIV tests!  The female has had the tests as well and we were all negative.  He has been very good and our marriage has improved tremendously since.  However, I have GAD amongst other issues and this experience has taken its toll on me, so much so that if I get a cold or stomach bug, I think I have AIDS!!!  I'm losing my mind!!!  Doctors won't give you an AIDS test every day... and even though I was told that its doesn't seem to be enough, even though I am always told I have a clean bill of heath.  I am also afraid I may have breast cancer, general cancer, blood cancer... I'm soo sooo scared I can hardly live!!!!  I'm losing my mind and not even a negative test will work, well maybe day by day only!  But it will keep resurfacing.  I don't want to live like this.  Most people don't obsess unless there are symptoms.  I'm backwards... no symptoms also means to me that I have something just hidden... any advice?

[ladyK]

There are many here to help you understand your feelings.  I hope you find the support you need.  An irrational fear is very hard to control.  I used to have phobias as a younger woman: some have stayed with me as normal fears (spiders/snakes).  I once manifested a male figure standing at my beside, I was petrified of the dark.  I don't know how I ever got any sleep as a teenager.  But as the years went on I finally got ahold of that.  I talk to myself and try to stay on the positive side until I don't feel so out of control.  Hope this helps. 

Take care, ladyK

[Shannon]

I have the worst AIDS phobia in the world.
I work in a law office and for some reason there is blood on multiple different paperwork and files and i seem to come into contact with it a lot! i always touch it too because i flip through the paperwork and dont notice it until ive already touched it! Plus i live at home with my brother who is an ex-heroin addict so im convinced he has it because of that. I am constantly in fear. Im engaged and so scared im going to catch it and give it to my fiance or get a cut while im doing the dishes or something and give it to my family. i do not know what to do i am so scared.