Hey Michelle,
My name is Stacey and I'm like yourself, just joined last night but came official today. I've not been officially dx with Hypochondria..but since I'm good at dx myself with everything else I guess this seems fitting. I never knew such a site existed. I took such comfort reading other peoples story's. It seems theres little comfort or understanding from others in my life. I am currently 30 years old and had my first (emotional meltdown) with this dreadful disorder when I was 19 years old. I raced in and out of ER's convinced I was having a heart attack....had a flexible sigmoidscopy, convinced I had colon cancer....(pretty embarrassing) the list goes on. At that time I was with my ex boyfriend.....and we were pretty serious. I was stuck in a black dark deep hole and wasn't sure how to get out. I was miserable. I needed a distraction....I was convinced that I needed to do something that would allow me to show myself that I was healthy. I thought that the one thing a "healthy" woman can do to show and feel "healthy" is have a baby. Needless to say I got pregnant...my daughter is now 10 years old. It was a total distraction....I started focusing all of my worries and concerns on her..not me...it was pretty balanced. I didn't suffer any more episodes until December of 2005. It was a nice 10 years while it lasted.
I woke up out of bed on December 26, 2005. I had an intense pain in my neck and back of my head. I had to hold my hand behind my head to lift my head up and get out of bed. The pain was so intense and even intensified when I would walk or sit up or down or turn my head to the left or right. I immediately went into a panic....full of anxiety...I went completely emotionally numb. I was convinced that this was something neurological.....at worst I knew it was a brain tumor....I started doing self tests on me...."could I walk a straignt line?" "was I dizzy....? or something more somatic...and I would put a book real close to my eyes and try to read...it was blurry....I was convinced i was dead...the tumor had now affected my eyesight...which I now know the object was too close in range for even God to see...went to the Dr....who gave me a "physical exam" I wanted it all...xrays......ultrasound....MRI..... he said "it's a pulled trapezius muscle....your having a muscle spasm." I temporarily accepted this..and left the office in such confidence and feeling so alive. Several days went by....the pain subsided...I eventually could turn my head to the left and right and walk just fine.... However, until this day...my neck is still stiff...
That whole incidence has brought back more episodes..I have visited the ER numerous times....visited the Dr a few times each week....trying to gain their assurance.....
Since then..I self dx myself with having... a brain tumor....a neck tumor.a tumor ..colon cancer, ovarian cancer, leukemia, lymphnode cancer...etccccccccccccccc.....
I thought like this because...i had frequent infections in the last few months...i knew my immune system was not working due to blood cancer....had CBC, electrolyte, metabolic panels done, stool cultures done, urinalysis done.......had a UTI..(which by the way I never get..) I knew it was probably uterine or bladder cancer.....had a nodule on my neck...due to a muscle not from my trapezius muscle...knew it was a lymph node enlarging..was waiting for the rest to come....I suffer from IBS...(thats what they say) there is no true test for that....been examined by DR's no acutal dx testing......said everythings ok....thought of colon cancer.....had a lot of stomach problems..bloating....nausea.....loss of appetite...(which they (DR's) say was brought on by my stress and anxiety since my episode in dec......my Dr wouldn't do any test...kept giving me medication.....for my stomach...anxiety medicine.... changed dRs went to a specialist...who did an ultra sound of my gallbladder........which they did find numerous gallstones and i have to have my gallbladder out on Tuesday....but im convinced thats not why I was having symptoms..many live silently with gallstones....but i will have it removed....went back to my DR and told him that i don't think the gallbladder is the problem......etc..."oh your healthy, don't worry....etc" besides when they do the scope on Tuesday for your surgery...they can see everythingggggggggggg.... thats the only part I'm looking forward too...because i always have this feeling there is a tumor....or some kind growing in me and by the time they find it ..it will be too late......
Went to see a chiropractor yesterday for my neck....they took x-rays...I'm thinking if there were any tumors they would have shown up or told me...i seen the xrays they looked okay of my neck and back....today i woke up and my low back hurts even more than before i went to the chiropractor....I "like many of you" was on this internet....searching...for what this might be...i was thinking a tumor on the tailbone or back which is causing my frequent bowelmovemetns....and urination......then it hought well...its a week bfeore my menstrual cycle starts maybe its just PMS...i have to let myself think this...or it will consume me and ruin my whole day....i just started feeling better in the last few days....until the next thing happens.......
I'm so glad to have had a chance to talk about this....everyone....like family...friends...etc think I'm a hypochondriac...so when ir eally don't feel good...they didnt believe me...i had to change dRs because of this...they didnt take me seriously anymore... I've missed alot of work due to appts....etc...i didnt really care if i lost my job of 7 years or not..i just wanted assurance i was healthy....
Enough about me...I just wanted an opportunity to tell me crazy story...
