Anxiety or something worse?

[frenchpastry]

I would really appreciate if you guys would look at my list of symptoms, and reassure me that it's just anxiety. I'm constantly worrying if I have bipolar or OCD (since both my parents have it), when I know I probably don't.. it just make me feel so insane. My mind is like on overload!

Here they are:
Depression
Anxiety
Depersonalization
Unstable moods - I never know when I'm going to break down
Obsessive thought
Fluncuating self-image - Somedays I'm America's Next Top Model (lol) and other days, I feel as if I'm nothing.
Hypocondria - whcih obviously ties into the anxiety
Paranoia - especially at night.. I always think someone is talking behind my back.. I feel like everyone is watching me at all times, and the embarassing part is.. is that I feel like the goverment or something is watching me through my computer.
Restless Legs and Insomnia - which I believe also ties into the anxiety

Thanks so much,
Ashley ;)

[jenny649]

Yes these things can all be symptoms of anxiety. You could have depression too, but you don't sound like you have OCD or bipolar. Have you been to a psychiatrist or anything for an evaluation?

[kuteness82]

Hey French. That all ties in with me except for the Paranoia. I don't think people are talking behind my back, or the government, etc... You should go for an evaluation. These seem to be early symptoms and signs of Schizophrenia. I know this first hand. My uncle that passed away last year, was severe Schizophrenic. And my father is Bi-polar. And my boyfriends ex-wife, is Schizophrenic. She is in a mental hospital now, has been for 5 years. I feel awful. No one asks for this to happen. But please go get an evaluation. Good luck.

[frenchpastry]

I will, and thanks. I've been to a therapist before, but all she did was try and teach me how to change my thoughts (which I know is just a part of therapy), but she rushed me into it and expected me to do it right then and there. That's hard, because this is how I've been thinking for most my life. I can't just say to myself "Okay, let's start thinking happier and not be so anxious." It doesn't work that way. So my mom is trying to get me an apt. with a Psychiatrist.

Thanks for the replies!! They mean so much to me.

Ashley

[miika]

Hi.

If you know that government or whatever is not actually looking you through your computer, sounds like you have anxiety issues. I know all that stuff. Do you mean that you have some stupid thoughts like that? I mean, you know its just your imagination?

[frenchpastry]

Yes, I know.. it just freaks me out.

[miika]

Well, I think its anxiety, really. You will be fine Let those thoughts come and go. But see some psychiatrist etc, You`ll get some help. How does your Depersonalization feels like? I had terrible period 2 years ago with that symptom.

[frenchpastry]

For me, it's like.. I'm my mind in a different body. I don't feel like myself.. I told my old therapist that I didn't know who I was, and she said that's impossible. I don't know.. it's just how I feel. Sometimes, I'll look in the mirror, and think "Who is this?" It's like I don't even recognize myself.. my body doesn't feel like my own. I think in the past two years, there has only been a select few days where I felt like myself. The rest of the time, I just feel insane because I don't know who I am.

What was it like for you?

[Rocket90]

French -

It sure sounds like anxiety to me.  Almost all of those symptoms fall into the realm of GAD.  I would certainly suggest that you get checked out and get any help that you may need.  You'll feel better in the end, knowing that you're getting help and on the road to improvement.

Take care.

[emy]

Although I am not a doctor, psychologist, or anything like that, I think you could have some kind of OCD as well, because OCD folks often have scarry thoughts or worries that they fear could be true (fear of going crazy, being crazy, constant repeated thoughts that frighten you- like you keep thinking you are dying, etc....).  You can have OCD without the compulsive ritual like behavior- just the thoughts alone.  The good news is, everything crazy that OCD people fear they are is ususally NOT true- but just the thought of it being true makes you question if it is true which leads up to horrible stress and anxiety.  You also sound like you could be bipolar though if you are having mood fuctuations and grandiose thinking.. whatever is going on, dont worry, its not the end of the world,  you are just a special person, and you can and will get this under control.  Keep us posted!

[jenny649]

I agree, the obsessive thoughts could be OCD. But don't worry about it too much, get a psychiatrict evaluation, they will tell you where to go from there. Even if you have OCD though, it's not the end of the world, in fact it's not much worse than anxiety. Either way it's not the end of the world, you will get through this and feel normal again. It may take time, but it will happen.