feeling low and struggling to motivate myself

[daisyjukes]

Two weeks ago, I decided that I couldn't carry on the way I was going.  I was working myself up into a real state and crying all the time to my husband and mom.  I felt like I couldn't cope and any minute I was going to lose the last thread of self control I had.

I decided that I needed to stop being so scared of anxiety and to practice seeing what it really is a release of Adrenalin into the body.  I practised seeing how for years I have lived in fear and the way I feel at the moment is just the result of this.

I've stopped the crying all the time.  I have five minutes each day when I give into it but the rest of the time I try to accept it.

However, I know I'm far from true acceptance.  I still hate all the feelings and I'm still depressed.  I feel disheartened today, why can't I truly accept how I feel? why do I still despair?  I feel the hope I had a few weeks ago that I could really do this if I wanted to has disappeared.  I feel hopeless again. I've cried in secret a few times today.   I feel tired of living with this, its been a year of feeling bad.  I've had anxiety for 8 years but this is the worst it has ever been.

I thought I could do this, maybe I can't.  How am I ever going to be able to cope when my baby is born.

[dbirm77]

Acceptance is not something you can master overnight.
Although it is the answer to our anxiety woes.....you will achieve levels of acceptance as you go.
What cannot falter..is your belief that this is the way to recovery.
You will have good days and bad ones..we all do.
It's how you rebound that is important.
Do not lose faith.
If you cannot fully accept at this moment than just act like you do.
Do everyday things...while crying if you have to...but understand that you are making it happen.

You may question how far you have come...but please don't question the belief that acceptance is your answer.

You can do it....your positive posts are proof of that.
Go back and read some of them to remind you of how far you have come.

Good Luck,

Drew

[Warbirdwf]

Acceptance is not something you can master overnight.
Although it is the answer to our anxiety woes.....you will achieve levels of acceptance as you go.
What cannot falter..is your belief that this is the way to recovery.
You will have good days and bad ones..we all do.
It's how you rebound that is important.
Do not lose faith.
If you cannot fully accept at this moment than just act like you do.
Do everyday things...while crying if you have to...but understand that you are making it happen.

You may question how far you have come...but please don't question the belief that acceptance is your answer.

Great post Drew! I agree w/what you're saying but...it's so hard to do when you're anxiety levels are causing your mind to have fear and irrational thoughts!

You can do it....your positive posts are proof of that.
Go back and read some of them to remind you of how far you have come.

Good Luck,

Drew

[daisyjukes]

Thanks guys, I appreciate your words of encouragement!!  Still feeling down today but I'm determined to carry on trying to accept.

Daisy

[Thejapster]

Good luck with everything!