psychiatrist called me "stubborn and bull-headed"!

[southpaw]

I have an earlier post about how I need my Xanax, in this topic section. So today I went to see the psychiatrist again (3rd time), and he was furious with me. Said I "did it all wrong". Apparently I wasn't supposed to go off the Lexapro (which wasn't helping, and was causing negative side effects) - I was supposed to keep taking it until he prescribed a few more medications for me to take in addition to the Lexapro. He wants me to take 3-4 medications at once, and NO BENZOS EVER. I told him I've tried like 10 SSRIs and other types of meds, and for an extended time, and not one has helped me, not one bit (except Wellbutrin for a brief period, which of course he told me not to take anymore). I said I didn't want to try any more medications (except benzos, but I didn't dare mention that ), and I didn't want to take 3-4 medications at once. So he went off about how he's the one who's done the research, and I don't know anything despite what I might think, and I'm stubborn and bull-headed, resistant, etc. He said I'm never going to get better without taking 3-4 meds at once, and he has no hope for my future. He said I have been taking Xanax 3 times a day for 1.5 years and that I am dependent. I reminded him that HE prescribed me that dose for one month, and that I had been taking much less before that. He accused me of lying.

I argued with him somewhat, asking him some questions about why SSRIs plus 2-3 other meds is really the best thing for ALL people, but he just kept saying that he knew better. He has never once mentioned counseling, exercise, or other non-med treatments. Not once.

At one point he asked if I was upset or angry about what he'd said, and I said, "actually, no" (frankly at that point I thought he was such a horrible human being that I couldn't even take him seriously). He said sometimes people feel that way after he speaks sternly to them, and he doesn't really intend to make people feel that way, but he thinks they need to hear what he has to say, and that he needs to phrase things very strongly.

I finally said, "okay, that's enough", and he reminded me a few more times that I will never get better without his help and all his meds, and then I was allowed to leave (with no goodbye from him, of course  ).

I actually WAS upset to some extent, because I think it's AWFUL for a doctor to talk to a patient like that - and then I started to wonder if everyone thinks I'm stubborn and bull-headed and impossible... But this doctor gets bad reviews online, I discovered, so at least I'm not the only one to experience this, and I'm going to add my negative review too.

I guess I'll go back to my regular doctor now, who would never treat me with such disrespect. I really do think (hope?) that I'm a pretty reasonable person! Most people tell me they think I'm really nice and agreeable. I do tend to be a bully target though.

Thanks for reading all this - just had to share with people who can relate to the struggle of overcoming anxiety!

[sweettooth]

Hi Southpaw . Sorry you had to go through this with this therapist. Sounds like he is the one who is bullheaded and stubburn . I definately think you need to get a second opinion on this. Sometimes finding a good therapist is like finding a good med. You have to try different ones till you find the right one. Its not like you havent tried the ssri's and it sounds like to me you have given them a fair shot. Keep persisting till you find a therapist and a treatment that works for you. Its your well being and you are ultimately responsible to take care of it the best way you feel is right. Good-Luck and take care..

[southpaw]

Thanks Sweettooth! See, now I'm worried that this is typical of psychiatrists. Not so much the bad behavior, but the refusal to prescribe benzos and the reliance on SSRIs and the like.

One other option I was considering was to see a specialist at a sleep clinic. I read an interview on cnn.com with a "sleep" doctor who happens to be located in our city, and he was very knowledgable about insomnia and meds for it, which is one of my core issues (and one reason I was taking Xanax). Maybe I can make an appt with him. I sleep only 6 hours a night (and that's a good night), and I don't think it's enough for me.

Thanks again for your support! :)

[tacodome]

Wow, that's quite a story.  It's unfortunate that a psychiatrist would treat you that way.  From what I can tell, SSRIs seem to be what everybody likes to prescribe, but if they don't work, and Xanax has, you should be able to find a doctor that will prescribe it for you.

Also, sleep is important.  Lack of sleep or not getting good sleep can add to our problems a lot, so I think that's a really good idea.

[charlie1]

Hi southpaw, I totally agree with sweettooth, that psychiatrist sounds an inconsiderate buffoon. Don't see him again and get another medical opinion for medication issues, whilst working yourself on diet and exercise. Good luck with things

[speedfreakadelic]

As soon as you're in a stable enough place, fire him and get a new doctor.  A little compassion really goes a long way when one is trying out/adjusting to new meds.  It may take a while for you to build up a mutual trust with a doctor - abuse of benzos is a concern with any new patient - but Xanax is really not an uncommon prescription in your situation.  I have a stand-by supply of Ativan for really bad episodes, but as long as I don't pop them like candy, I know my doc will prescribe more when I need it.

Good luck!

[Mishielynn]

This post, had me wanting to jump out of my chair.
Because I had a phychiatrist like that whom I dealed with since I was probably 15.
They seem to get pretty pig-headed.
And when he started prescribing me Adderal, cymbalta, xanax, and tried adding an antisphycotic in the mix (I think those were the meds gahh there were so many.. )
I finally realized he was an irrational booboo head.

I once asked him "do you have a chemical imbalance yourself, or do you just like screwing around with other peoples"

haha. I was angry.
But I agree with others here, You don't deserve that.
I finally have a doctor that is compassionant and patient. That's what you not only need,
but you DESERVE.

What they seem to commonly forget is that WE are the ones going through the problems, they
just get to use us like guinee pigs.

Hope all is well now. =]

[Nat]

Yes, this seems typical of many psychs. Despite asking for benzos for years, I have run into nothing but benzo-phobic docs. Saw a GP today and had no better luck - he said "absolutely not" to benzos (or any dedicated anxiolytic, for that matter). Pushed Paxil despite me telling him I had already been on it with a negative outcome. Haven't been able to get any doc to even consider benzos, which is unfortunate because I really think they could help. I'd take Buspar as well, but there has been no mention of that, either. My only anxiety drug option is Vistaril (hydroxyzine), which is barely effective.

[tmicrowave]

yep sounds like everyone i've ever seen

nat
i was on vistaril for a bit
it was ok, better than nothing sometimes

[WiSp]

My old psychiatrist was not anti benzos, but my new one is. I fought a lot to be able to get SOME, i.e.: 4 ativan per week. They see everyone like a future addict. And they say "we must not be negative and turns all into a drama" when themselves they see benzos like a monster and can't measure how just some can really change a life. I hate psychiatrists and psychologists. It would be good to not need them. We are stuck with the meds because we can't get them without permission, but doctors seem less anti benzos. I begin to understand why some organizations on the net sell those freely...but I prefer to stay away from this suspicious stuff.

[sixpack]

Wisp

I understand your frustration but maybe the shrinks have seen a lot of their patients have very bad outcomes with benzoes?  Just playing the devil's advocate   

[WiSp]

Yes I realize that already. But that's not a reason to classify everyone in the same case. They should evaluate each person and see if she/he may abuse benzos. I don't know, but benzos exist, and they have a purpose despite all their bad background. Also, some are less addictive (the long half life ones). So why not to just discard the most addictive like xanax and let people use others...I don't like the black or white point of view.

[electracat]

Nicely said!