Im new and looking for direction/help

[Me_Chelle]

Hello all

My name is Michelle, I am 38, married with a 4yr old son.

I know I suffer from anxiety and am on medication for that, but just dont know where to start as I have been reading that there are many different symptoms.

I am always tired, can be happy one minute and sad or angry the next.  I know I am paranoid as I believe that everyone is talking about me and dont like to upset or disagree with anyone.  I find it hard to say no, infact most of the time I cant.  I always plan to do thing and then never do them.  I call myself a lazy perfectionist as I want for instance my house to be tidy and clean ALL them time, but am too lazy to go through with it.  0534 I could go on forever, so I will leave you guys with this and look around a bit when I get time.

If anyone has any ideas on particular forums in here that I should checkout please let me know.

Thanks for listening and hope that I can get to know some of you soon.

Michelle xxx

[FeelingOptimistic]

Hi Me,

Welcome!  Glad you are here!

I have GAD, panic, and depression.  I started meds in July after refusing to try them for at least ten years, and my energy level has improved.  I was wondering how long you have been on medication.  Maybe it hasn't had time to kick in yet with all the benefits.

I am also a perfectionist, but I will find myself driven to the point of exhaustion and don't feel settled if everything isn't "right".  I think it's a good thing to a point, but can drive you nuts.  My counselor said whenever I think, "I need to do this" or "I have to do that"- say to myself, "So what?  The _____ isn't perfect, but so what?"  That is hard to do some times, but it helps.  I would also make myself a To Do List a mile long and would feel defeated if it all wasn't done.  Now I keep my lists shorter and more manageable to I can feel like I've accomplished something.

There is alot of good information to read here.  Post with your questions, there are many supportive people here that will share their experiences with you.

Looking forward to getting to know you.

Feeling Optimistic

[sixpack]

HI and welcome.

It sounds to me you have a nice mix of depression and GAD.  We have folders devoted to both.     So have a look around. There is a nice a group of folks here and I feel certain you'll find a few nuggets around here to help you out.   

[Hanna]

Thank you for your post. I totally understand about the worrying part with friends -- "I screw things up and they'll gossip about me, or they talk about me/dislike me." I've often wondered, for myself, if this isn't slightly a bi-polar disorder... or maybe they're just all connected (bi-polar, anxiety, and depression). Maybe bi-polar is just an extreme level of anxiety disorder. I've been told, by a psychiatrist, that the happy one minute then angry another minute feelings are part of bi-polar disorder... maybe that's correct, maybe not (I didn't have a lot of faith in that particular psychiatrist). Paxil worked really well for me in making that happy/angry swing stop. However, after taking Paxil for 3 years it's beginning to lose some of it's effect... and it's an extremely difficult drug to get off of. I'm interested in hearing what you take and how it's working for you.

The perfectionist thing I understand too. If you let it go then it's really hard to get anything done (the house becomes an absymal mess but you can't clean it because to do so will take all day to get every single inch perfect), but when you're on top of it, it's hard to stop working so hard to make everything perfect. That seems like part of the anxiety too, this also stopped for me with the Paxil and I became okay with just cleaning one section here and there... thus actually making it easier to keep on top of things :-)

I look forward to hearing how things progress for you! Take care