Maybe I'm just weird?

[FlyingScribJelly]

For some reason, it really scares me when people call me "sweetie", "honey" etc.
It makes me feel like I did something wrong, and I really hate the feeling... 
anyone else ever had this problem?

[sixpack]

HI there

I know there are folks out there and here on this forum who don't like those pet names used for them.  I think it has a lot to do with feeling talked down to.

I'll say I do use those terms from time to time.  But I try and be careful about it if I don't know the person to whom I am talking.  Some folks just don't like it.

In the South, it is just the culture often.  I don't know how many times I've been called honey, sweetie, sugar.  And I'm an old fart of 45.     It isn't meant anything other than being a friendly greeting.  Up north you don't hear it nearly as much. 

[BruiserBear]

I'm a 33 year old guy, and I've always liked it when a woman referred to me as "sweetie" or "honey".  Including my wife. :)  I think I interpret such words as caring, and gentle. 

Just goes to show you that one person's worry is another person's joy.

[sixpack]

I'm a 33 year old guy, and I've always liked it when a woman referred to me as "sweetie" or "honey".  Including my wife. :)  I think I interpret such words as caring, and gentle. 

Just goes to show you that one person's worry is another person's joy

so bruise your just an ole softy aren't ya   

but it is true what one person doesn't enjoy and find comforting, another will feel just the opposite.

[tmicrowave]

yeah i totally understand
it makes me feel uncomfortable, and i'd never do that to someone else
it does sorta feel like your being talked down to
its probably more-so this way if your a girl like us
it feels insulting to me sort of
not that it's a huge deal to me, i just know what you mean.

[bosstonez604]

I dunno... if you're weird, that makes two of us.

When people use pet names, if I'm already kinda wound up or a lil anxious, it makes me feel mislabelled and frustrated, like they're trying to box me as something I'm not... either that or it's just kind of embarrassing which makes me anxious and then pissed off lol.

It's 100x worse when you don't know the person or what their style of diction is... maybe they call everyone that, or just people they like, or people they don't like, and they're saying it in a sarcastic way... and you wanna like, fire back at them.

I dunno... but I Feel you.

[cutebutpsycho]

Hi Jelly!
Yeah, I agree. I mean--my mom can do it, but anyone else, it just feels so patronizing. Maybe it's a way for them to come down on you and not seem to harsh. I've heard people joke about Southerners (in the US) saying mean things about someone and then following it up with a "bless his/her heart," which somehow makes it okay. It might be like that, you know, a way to soften the blow. I don't know. I could probably describe my reaction to those words (especially when people I don't like use them on me) as 'bristling'. I 'bristle' when they do that. If that makes any sense, then +1 for you... I'm sleepy, so I don't know if this stuff is coming out right!

cutebutpsycho

[shrublet]

A lot of people don't even realize that they call people pet names. It just becomes habit. I like it or hate it depending on whose doing it- and yep, it can come across as patronizing at times. But that's truly not how most people mean it. It can just be one of those conversational habits that people don't even notice they're doing, and it doesn't even occur to them that it may bother others.

I'd try not to project negative interpretations into it because after a while, you realize that it's totally futile to try and figure out what others are thinking.

[un4td]

I hate it. Some people do it to try to belittle you. I'm a short guy and I get called "Boss', "Big Guy", "Little Guy", "Chief", "Killer", routinely.