Is this a personality disorder, anxiety, me being crazy..?

[disco88]

I have a lot of different issues that overlap each other, but I will bring up one specific thing I need advice about. Please don't tell me to see a doctor to be diagnosed, I am going to one soon. I only want opinions.

 Ever since I was pretty young, I have had an irrational fear of certain men. Not all men, but many of them give me an unsafe/scared feeling...particularly some older white men but it varies. I am a 21 year old female and I watch the news A LOT so I see how sick some people are...especially towards females/children. Sometimes if I'm in a store alone I may see a guy staring at me 'the wrong way'. My heart starts pounding and I am convinced he could be some kind of sex offender who may follow me into the parking lot and abduct me. Years ago I used to go jogging at a sports park and I would always have a cell on me in case I needed to call 911. After a while I stopped going all together because I realized that the sports park is rather deserted and surrounded by nothing but woods and a creek (a killers playground). Sometimes I even get a creeped out feeling if the curtains are open at night and people can see in. I think that maybe some nut will see a young female in the house and want to break in. It sounds totally crazy but these things have happened to people before.

I know it sounds like PTSD or something, but I am 100% positive nothing has ever happened to me that would make me think this way. Never been raped, kidnapped, abused, or molested. I always thought this was an odd anxiety problem. But I was reading about something called "Schizotypal personality disorder" and a lot of the signs fit me, some not at all. In fact, I display many traits of several personality disorders. With Schizotypal, a sign was paranoid thoughts/suspicions of others..but you are aware that they're irrational. I am incredibly aware my fear is irrational. I'm not delusional or psychotic.

Do these things seem more like an anxiety disorder, or a personality disorder in your opinion?

[Door]

A good psychiatrist will see you many, many, many sessions (months) before diagnosing a personality disorder.  (FYI, I hate the term "personality disorder" because it sounds like a person's character is flawed and that they are inherently "bad.")  Personality disorders are diagnosed for people who have patterns of behaviors and beliefs that are so ingrained that treatment is really, really, really difficult.  My person feeling is that those with personality disorders actively resist help.  In my opinion, they tend to be very rigid in their beliefs, and unlike you, do not see them as irrational.  This is why treatment can be a challenge.

I must add that if a treatment program does not work for a person, it does not necessitate a personality disorder.  It could be that the treatment was wrong for the person, the psychiatrist/therapist was ineffective, or the treatment program was flawed/bad/damaging.

< personal bias > Or, you could skip the whole psychiatrist thing if you are certain that you don't want meds and begin dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) with a trained professional.  DBT was designed for women with borderline personality disorder.  A clinician assess you to see if DBT could help you.  You usually meet weekly with a small group, and everyone learns and practices new life skills.  DBT was found to help other disorders too, like depression, PSTD, anxiety, etc.  I have not tried DBT myself, although I am very interested in doing so.  It looks more effective to actively attack an issue with practice partners than talking to a therapist ad nauseum.  < /end personal bias >

All that said, it is rational to have some fear as a young single woman.  You have to be alert.  I agree that you may be over-alert, which causes more harm than good.  It seems like you have excessive, unnecessary anxiety.

My personal opinion (because you asked) is that you have an anxiety problem but no personality disorder.

[ReggieA]

Sounds like  social anxiety to me although I am not 100% sure.. As for the news well everything on the news these days only show the negative sides and you hardly ever hear anything positive. You are missing out in all the great things life has to offer and what are the chances that you will get abducted really, I used to live in Compton since I was born until the age of 23 and even though it is a very dangerous city, not once did I feel that something may happen to me. Oh and NO! you are not crazy.. take care.

[lilgina]

Hi, I think you are not crazy, maybe not even axious. It sounds like you are simply being aware of your surroundings.  Since you know bad things can happen (from watching news reports etc.) it seems to have hieghtened your awarwness to certain things. And that is a good thing, to always be aware of your surroundings. Just don't let it jade your perception of the world.  Yes, there are bad people out there but keep in mind, the good people far out number the bad.  And you don't want to spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder when you could be enjoying life and good things that are ahead of you.

lilgina