Paranoid and feeling of intuition is KILLING ME!!!

[nicki4nyc]

I'm so totally stressed because my husband has cheated on me in the past when we were going through some really bad times in our relationship.  Even though things are better, he is with me almost all the time and the time apart is usually always accounted for.  I just can't shake these feelings that I shouldn't trust him and I'm always looking at him suspicious even when I don't have a reason.  Its like a feeling comes over me and I just feel like dumping him and its weird because I usually don't have any material facts or anything to be suspicious about.  It just is a weird feeling in my gut but I have been wrong so many times that I've lost count.  I remember a time when I acted as though I hated him and he was really hurt so he confided in different people which led to infidelity.  Things are pretty good between us and we just came back from a family trip and is planning a trip for just us two around Thanksgiving but I'm so stressed out with work and my classes and getting kids situated in school now.  My therapist told me that sometimes when things are overwhelming it can cause this horrible anxiety and I guess I just look for things to go wrong.  I'm so so uncomfortable with myself because sometimes I feel worried and don't know why so I make up reasons and since he did have issues in the past I guess blaming him is the easiest reason for me to be stressed.  I hope it pasts soon or I make do something stupid like tell him its "over again"  I just freak out sometimes and curse him out and dump him and then I feel better so I apologize and tell him to disregard it.  But I can't go on doing this to him, I'm sure it hurts his feelings, sometimes he cries when I say the evil things I feel from time to time!  Am I alone in this horrible paranoia?