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Author Topic: I feel very anxious of my own existence  (Read 9878 times)

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Offline talMV

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #10 on: June 15, 2011, 09:06:15 PM »
I have felt/often do feel EXACTLY the same way....I think about my existence, what is real/reality, life and death, the concept of time, etc, etc, etc..... I have strong depersonalization when i have panic attacks, like i literally feel like i am not in my body, like i don't know who or what i am.....it's terrifying and bizarre.... I can say that reading your posts and knowing i am not the only one to feel this way helps me so much! I can't believe other people feel this way and think this way too! It comforts me to know i'm not alone..... nor are you.
Now what!? Yes, i have heard meditation works well.....but it is SO difficult for me to quite my mind and often when i try i get anxious and want to get up and move and find a way to escape myself (which is impossible! Hence, the continued anxiety....) and that defeats the whole purpose..... anyway, thank you for posting this!!
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Offline LondonBoy

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #11 on: June 24, 2011, 07:10:56 AM »
Finally some people who GET what I feel like.

Its totally terrifying, The only way im finding around this is to just summon the strength to concentrate on other tasks until it dissappears into the back of my mind. It will come back but with more of this training im able to not let it overwhelm me. Although it does creep back in! The thing is you will not find an answer to this question so u have to stop thinking about it. Easier said than done I know. I'll let you know if i figure out how to deal with it. Scares the **** out of me
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Online tinam7

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #12 on: June 24, 2011, 08:13:11 AM »
I am at the end of life as is my brother suffering so horribly. Even getting out can be so terrible.

But I have worked on myself and am surprisingly accepting of all--or nothing--there is. When you are young, as I believe you all are, you need to sustain yourself with work, with a strong Self, with developing your own interests. A big part of my life now is exercise and, as has been mentioned, meditation.

Are there answers to the big questions? Probably not. I'm close to finding out (!). But until then I intend to enjoy myself and bring joy to the people around me.
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Offline anonytic

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #13 on: June 26, 2011, 12:55:46 AM »
Eversince I could remember, I've always pondered my own existence. As a kid I would not be able to sleep just thinking about death and non-existance. It went on for many many years before I could manage to get over it. I've now turned it into some sort of philosophical interest.

I've crashed my friend's philosphy lectures and read about Plato and Socrates, read Sophie's world and The Solitaire mystery, and somehow just embracing how little we matter has helped getting over the fright.

I do still sometimes feel a bit disconnected from the world and would just touch a wall or a tree to feel the texture to feel that it's really there because I feel like I'm walking on nothing (we're basically living on a floating ball) and needed something solid to feel grounded. I'd sometimes walk and turn around really quickly just to see if the world stayed the same if I wasn't looking, just for fun. Or I'd look at my fingers and think about how we're just basically meat that has somehow managed to gain intelligence as a species.

Although now I'm not afraid to the point of having sleepless nights anymore. I am still afraid of dying and being in the state of non-existance and joke about how I can relate to Voldemort.

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Offline Ink_Slinger

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #14 on: June 27, 2011, 06:30:50 PM »
Deepthought,

I know where you're coming from...I have always been analytical about my existence from a very young age, thinking about my own mortality as others have posted.  Or like you said "how strange it is to be anything at all".

Sometimes I lay down at night, I put my hand over my heart as it races and I think "how does a heart continue to beat for 70-80 years" or whatever it may be, but it seems impossible to me.  Or I think about all of the organs in my body or my brain and how in the world it functions...freaks me out.  This is definitely more physical but I also contemplate the existential and it also freaks me out.

I sometimes can't even watch shows about the universe.  I start breathing erratically and have to turn it off.  My brain, I think, can't process how expansive and infinite the universe is.  It's like a reverse fear of heights or something.

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"Adults are, like, this mess of sadness and phobias." - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Offline LondonBoy

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #15 on: June 28, 2011, 11:00:59 AM »

Sometimes I lay down at night, I put my hand over my heart as it races and I think "how does a heart continue to beat for 70-80 years" or whatever it may be, but it seems impossible to me.  Or I think about all of the organs in my body or my brain and how in the world it functions...freaks me out.  This is definitely more physical but I also contemplate the existential and it also freaks me out.

I sometimes can't even watch shows about the universe.  I start breathing erratically and have to turn it off.  My brain, I think, can't process how expansive and infinite the universe is.  It's like a reverse fear of heights or something.

Yes my friend, this is exactly the same as how I feel. Thoughts about the body, how it is functions, what energy is behind it causing it to function. I think about 'how I think' or the electrical impulses whizzing around my brain sends me into a state of frenzy,

I am the same also when watching shows about the universe. Ironically i love these shows but just cant watch them because of how deeply it makes me think into this.

Im not sure if its just that my anxiety will not allow me to ponder these things with a calm mind, but I dont understand how u think about this stuff with a calm mind. I mean its not like we are thinking about some event in the 3rd person like something exterior to ourselves. Im thinking about what we are.

Ah! I think ive even gotta stop typing, there goes my brain again!
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Offline tattoolady14

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #16 on: July 02, 2011, 03:20:16 AM »
Deepthought,

I know where you're coming from...I have always been analytical about my existence from a very young age, thinking about my own mortality as others have posted.  Or like you said "how strange it is to be anything at all".

Sometimes I lay down at night, I put my hand over my heart as it races and I think "how does a heart continue to beat for 70-80 years" or whatever it may be, but it seems impossible to me.  Or I think about all of the organs in my body or my brain and how in the world it functions...freaks me out.  This is definitely more physical but I also contemplate the existential and it also freaks me out.

I sometimes can't even watch shows about the universe.  I start breathing erratically and have to turn it off.  My brain, I think, can't process how expansive and infinite the universe is.  It's like a reverse fear of heights or something.

I am the exact same way about the universe thing. The whole concept of where our universe exists exactly or what it exists IN is so mind-boggling that I can't even begin to fathom... I just can't think about it. It's a bit too much.
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Offline wailua

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #17 on: July 18, 2011, 01:47:45 AM »
Wow-  I totally get this.  I love shows about the universe and stuff, but it makes me really scared and panicky sometimes!  I never knew other people felt the same way.  I thought I was just kindof weird and thinking too much about this stuff.

I also get wrapped up in the mystery of death and what happens.  I'm so totally fearful of death and want to know what happens, but of course I will never know until it happens.  And then I just get in this circular logic and I get all freaked out and scared.

I'm so glad there are others who can relate.
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Offline VikingJack

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #18 on: December 02, 2012, 06:59:49 PM »
It is such a weird feeling isn't it? I hate it but can't image life without the depersonalisation experiences. I remember when they started, the first attacks, the fear. Ten years on it is no better, but then why should it be. Without the answer to the ultimate question, it won't get any better. Life gets more surreal every day and nothing you can do stops it. Distraction helps, but for how long? It rears its head again. The fear and panic comes back. No one can help, it's your head, your existence. I fill my life with love, family, work, but at 23:52 in the quiet on night it doesn't protect me from the deep black, the realisation of existence, the panic, the hole in my awareness. How do I even know that I will wake up, that I will see my wife and beautiful children. I don't and it scares me. Sure you can say 'why worry there is nothing you can do so go with the flow'. But that doesn't help really... Hmmm sick feeling in stomach, manic mind, andrenline flowing. Good to know others feel it too. But unless you have an answer (logical) we are no help to each other really. I need to stop now, too much waffle, no substance, such is life
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Offline sdjw37

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Re: I feel very anxious of my own existence
« Reply #19 on: December 04, 2012, 10:06:11 AM »
I have this feeling Xs 10 .. overanalyzing is a huge problem. Don't really know how to deal with it but like someone said above just breathing and concentraiting on that seems to help a little.

sdjw
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